The top non-slutty female characters in video games
Number 7: The legendary Ms. Pacman. Not a proper female, I know, but she …er… does dress like one. If you’re into round, yellow, pill-poppers you’ll just love the old lady.
Number 6: Princess Peach, ruler of Mushroom Kingdom and Mario’s personal fetish. Childish, but also a part of video gaming history. Definitely not a slut.
Number 5: Elaine Marley from the Monkey Island series. Funny, spirited, Ron Gilbert’s creation and a governor. Good looking and old fashioned. Won’t strip for you, let alone make a naked public appearance.
Number 4: Shodan, from System Shock (and apparently SS2). Call her a slut and she’ll fry you; perhaps even destroy earth. An amazing piece of homicidal AI, if I ever saw one and a perfect match for Wintermute.
Number 3: Kerrigan, another villain, and not 100% human either. Great looks (for a Zerg hybrid at least), a member of the order of the abominably nasty and key figure in the best RTS expansion ever: Starcraft Brood War.
Number 2: April Ryan from the Longest Journey and Dreamfall. Uniter of worlds and magically inclined, April is also a talented and rather ‘alternative’ girl from the future, who just so happens to star in adventure games. Recently into hot arcade action too.
Number 1: Jade, the star of the amazing Beyond Good and Evil action-adventure game. She has style, flair, good looks and a kind heart (Ooooh! that’s sweet). She’s also a revolutionary. Like Rosa Luxembourg only with green lips. Just have a look at this great game. Control each and every Jade‘s action. Follow the link.
30 Apr 2006, 4:11 pm
That picture next to Elaine Marley is Kate Capsize. Just so’s you know.
30 Apr 2006, 8:17 pm
Oh dear, you are so right… What a cickup. I’ll just fix it. Thanks a lot, mate!
30 Apr 2006, 8:25 pm
There, fixed. Thanks anonymous
01 May 2006, 12:41 pm
You forgot Cortana – the AI construct from the Pillar of Autumn. She ain’t no slut – sassy, on the ball and straight to the point!
01 May 2006, 1:10 pm
Hmm..intersting. Never heard of that bitch though
Thanks tomleece.
01 May 2006, 2:22 pm
Sorry, she’s from Halo!
01 May 2006, 2:28 pm
Aha. I see! Never touched this allegedly brill game…
02 May 2006, 9:25 am
How about Bombette?
She’s also a revolutionary, of a very explosive kind!
02 May 2006, 9:34 am
By the way, I did a similar feature for our magazine (Strana Igr, or GameLand, just for you to know), and here’s who I come up with (in no particular order):
- Samus Aran (Metroid)
- Ravel ((Planescape: Torment)
- (honorable mention) Baba Yaga (different games)
- Fatima Doohan (Anachronox)
- Deionarra (Planescape: Torment)
- Rosella/Valanice (King’s Quest)
- Jennifer Simpson (Clock Tower)
- Alice (American McGee’s Alice)
- Sarah Kerrigan (Starcraft)
- Shodan (System Shock)
- Grace Nakimura (Gabriel Knight)
- Nicole Collard (Broken Sword)
- Ms. Pac-man
- Bombette (Paper Mario)
The article (in Russian, as it is) can be found
here.
02 May 2006, 9:40 am
Very intersting… Thanks a lot Chentzilla. And yes, Grace would make an excellent addition.
02 May 2006, 9:57 am
You might also find this of interest. This is real women’s opinion on “digital women”, as they call them.
I found this resource when working on the article.
02 May 2006, 11:24 am
So, tell me, as you apparently are from Russia, in which city do you live? (you, lucky you)
02 May 2006, 11:26 am
Oh, and thanks for the link too…
02 May 2006, 11:46 am
Why the interest?
It’s Moscow now, but I come from Perm.
02 May 2006, 2:21 pm
Because the (two) Russian cities I’ve seen were breathtaking… And Moscow was extremely interesting. And I’m interested in cities altogether… That’s about it I guess.
06 May 2006, 6:29 am
Great! Now do the slutty ones.
07 May 2006, 5:24 am
Not a bad idea this….
08 May 2006, 2:00 am
Haha lmao nice title gnome! now im going to read the artical. btw system shock 2 rules!
08 May 2006, 2:04 am
Yeah Wintermute and Shodan should totally date.
08 May 2006, 12:39 pm
I’ve been trying to get them in touch, you know. Apparently they are far too busy scheming.
13 May 2006, 9:08 pm
Another great female character is Alyx Vance (Half Life 2): realistic-looking and intelligent, though not a playable character.
14 May 2006, 4:42 am
Hmmm…I guess so, besides HL2 is all-around great…
22 May 2006, 12:45 am
No sorry Alyx Vance is a slut
22 May 2006, 12:52 am
You say so? Interesting…
21 Jun 2006, 5:24 pm
How is she portrayed within the game as a slut? She doesn’t groan when she climbs up ledges, nor does she bend over excessively for the player etc. She is portrayed more or less as your average woman-with as little sexual innuendo as possible.
(Although I suppose it’s the player’s discretion as to what angle she is viewed at, although that it is not the developer’s intention)
Kaikara
21 Jun 2006, 5:41 pm
Kaikara,
I do believe you are absolutely right, and with a nice humorous twist too, but I do believe drewboy was kidding…
Cheers
23 Jun 2006, 2:24 pm
I really liked Laura, the protagonist of D2 for dreamcast… A terrifically weird and spooky adventure, where Laura remains mute while discovering what happened when her plane crash landed in arctic Canada.
wikipedia entry
23 Jun 2006, 2:28 pm
Amazing! A pure Dreamcast heroin… She seems excellent and quite interesting. Quite as expected.
Thanks a ton my anonymous friend.
27 Jun 2007, 9:50 am
But Jade wears purple knickers… SLUT.
27 Jun 2007, 11:24 am
Well, she could ‘ave been wearing suspenders you know… Still, I see wisdom in your point…
10 Aug 2007, 3:03 am
Nice list, gnome, but I agree that Samus Aran (the Metroid series) deserves a place on this list also. Not only is Samus not a slut, but to my knowledge, she’s never even been marketed as a sex object, in the hopes of parting horny boy gamers from their money.
Similarly, if/when you do the “revised, expanded, updated list”, I would hope to see Bastila Shan from the original “Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic” game. Bioware managed to make her a potential love interest without ever going the easy “sexy boytoy” route.
10 Aug 2007, 5:21 am
Can’t say you’re wrong on the Samus front, as she also one of the few characters whose gender (even in a stereotypical manner) affects the storyline/gameplay of the Metroid series.
As for Bastila Shan… don’t know yet… I must shamefully admit to only having played KOTOR for a few hours… I’ll check it out though… Definitely.
The updated list.. hmmm… could be a good idea…
24 Mar 2011, 2:22 pm
Finally a list that doesn’t have Lara Croft as the number one super slut in a video game.
30 Apr 2012, 10:08 pm
That’s not April Ryan, but a girl named Cloe. April stayed in Arcadia, and the second game (which that picture was taken from) is based on Cloe’s experiences.
30 Apr 2012, 10:11 pm
Scratch that, Zoe. Zoe Castillo