The Ballad of Gay Tony

Star Trek Ships

Spaceships are pretty sweet. I want one. Not just some little shuttle craft or cargo ship though – I want one of those ones that looks like a racing car version of spaceship with big guns on it. There have have been some great examples of mean-looking ships, as well as crap or even funny-looking ones in the many sci-fi shows over the years. Star Trek is without question NOT the sci-fi show with the best looking ships, but it is a fantastic show (or ‘franchise’ of shows) that at least has spaceships. There have been lots that were seen in odd episodes here and there and never seen again, but of the major players in the Star Trek universe, here are what I think are the best:

5 – Borg Cube
Borg Cube - Star Trek Ship

Yes, it’s looks pretty unremarkable in itself, but not many ships instantly strike fear into the heart like a Borg Cube! And when you’ve see one in battle, seen how huge and powerful it is, how it rips apart vessels left, right, and centre, you can’t help but be in awe of it. Until Species 8472 came along and effortlessly destroyed 15 of them, of course!

 

4 – Jem’Hadar Battleship
Jem Hadar Battleship - Star Trek Ship
The weird-looking junkies might be slaves but they’ve sure got some decent kit to play around with. This huge capital ship can easily slice a path through a Federation fleet without even breaking a sweat! Plus, it looks exactly like a big, scary, evil alien ship should – angry, imposing, powerful, and… cool!

 

 

3 – Klingon Bird of Prey
Bird Of Prey - Star Trek Ship
Yes it’s small, but it sure packs a mean punch. They rarely attack alone, and a fleet of them are like a swarm of locusts, nibbling away until the target is neutralised, and on many occasions in the past these targets have been some our very own Federation vessels! They look cool, have cloaking devices, and can even land on… umm… stuff. I would be happy to own one of these babies!

 

 

2 – Romulan Warbird
Romulan Warbird - Star Trek Ship
There have been a few different ones of these but the one that made its mark on me is this one, first appearing in Next Generation. It’s probably not the most efficient design, what with all the space in the middle wasted, but you don’t often see one of them in trouble in a battle! Its designers clearly wanted to stay with the Roman Empire theme and it works – when one of them decloaks, you know you’re in for an interesting time!

 

 

1 – USS Defiant
USS Defiant - Star Trek Ship
Well, they sure took their sweet time but finally the Federation creates a ship that doesn’t suck ass! I know their main interest is exploration and the wussies don’t want to upset anyone by daring to build something powerful, but would it really hurt to build a few actual warships? All those cumbersome, stupid-looking ships with saucers and sticky-outy warp nacelles… Let’s face it, they couldn’t fight their way out of a junk yard. The Defiant, however, is another story. It’s small, maneuverable, and so powerful it had to have its ‘structural integrity field’ modified just so it didn’t tear itself apart! It’s armed with normal phasers and photon torpedoes, but also has fancy new pulse phasers, quantum torpedoes and special armour, and is even equipped with a cloaking device! It was a long time coming, but finally the Federation has a ship that looks cool and can kick ass!

 

  • CD Leeth

    I agree. I loved the Defiant! Coolest Star Trek ship ever. Maybe the coolest SF ship ever.

  • I certainly agree about the Defiant (and your use of the phrase “sticky-outy”). I always seem to get a bit frowny-faced when I focus on the deflector though. It really needs tweaking. It keeps making me think of a vaccuum cleaner or some other unspaceship-like device. But still, they did a great job making it look different, cool and still Federationy. Unlike their Galaxy Class ship….guh. To go from the Enterprise seen in the first three films to THAT? All someone did was take a table spoon and say, “Well, here’s our new Enterprise folks!” Whomever designed the saucer-to-nacelle ratio to be so off is really overcompensating for some serious saucer envy they must’ve had in their youth.

    The Bird of Prey was certainly one of the single best ship designs to come along no matter what show you include. I was nuts for that ship when it first appeared. Unfortunately, like Boba Fett and Wolverine, it got way too much exposure. Part of the allure is that it isn’t everywhere you turn…until it IS everywhere you turn. I noticed that the scale of the Bird of Prey changed at times too (same with Wolverine, come to think of it). And, while I understand what Nicholas Meyer was going for with the firing position (wing position down, as a real bird attacking), I really hate the way it looks when it is like that. when they are up or even when they are simply straight out, it looks so so much better, IMO.