Getting away with Murder.

If you’re like me, you will be pissed off because you have recently been arrested for murder again. People have been murdering for the last few hundred thousand years and just because of DNA and modern police methods does mean there’s a reason to get caught. Follow these four rules, and you’ll soon be happily murdering again;

Choose your victims.
What separates the top serial killers from the also-rans, is there choice of victim. If you choose from the lower rungs of society you can kill eighty people before people even notice. I personally recommend Prostitutes, Paparazzi, Spammers, Paedophiles, etc…

Choose your burial sites wisely.
There is no end to quality places to dump bodies there are oceans, estuaries, rivers, Everglades and swamps. However I still, week after week, read about bodies turning up in parks, trunks of cars, even beneath houses. For crying out loud, remember no body, no murder.

Destroy the murder weapon.
Important rule this one, and if you cannot destroy the murder weapon please at least try and get rid of it. Do not, I repeat do not try and sell the weapon to a undercover policeman (I wish someone had taught me this rule)

Have a creative Motive.
I would suggest only murdering people you do not know for reasons no one will ever understand. Is there absolutely a reason for you to murder the old lady in the singled room fault? No, then she’s your next Victim. Not only is this clever, it might get you a good movie deal.

Remember, murder is like anything else in life. It’s not hard if you think about what you are doing. If you do it half arsed you will end up in jail.

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