Top Five Ugliest Cars

Tata Nano

Tata Nano
Created by Indian company, Tata, the Nano is currently the cheapest car in the world to buy brand new. As you might imagine, it’s specs reflect that, with a 624cc engine which generates a mere 35bhp, and it only has the absolute minimum of interior features. The boot doesn’t even open – it has to be accessed from inside the car! All this is understandable for its price though, but did they really have to make it look so hideous?
Fiat Multipla
Fiat Multipla
Good old Fiat. They’re never ones to make conventional-looking vehicles, are they? I guess they’re relying on the old “Oh, it’s Italian, it must be artistic!” cliche. Well sorry Fiat, but this offering is a monstrosity! What’s with the bit under the windscreen? Granted, the second-generation model looks a lot nicer and does away with this weird bit but still! This version regularly appears on ‘ugly car’ polls and with good reason – the Multipla is a MultiFAIL!

Ford Ka

Ford Ka
I was a bit surprised when I first saw this stupid thing from Ford. Their cars are usually decent enough, if unspectacular, but this pretentiously-named ‘Ka’ (definitely NOT pronounced the same as ‘Car’ by me) looks like a wedge of cheese balanced on marbles! The ‘Sport’ Ka and ‘Street’ Ka (both all of 93bhp) look even more annoying. Like the Fiat, however, the new version of the Ka is a vast improvement.
Citroen 2CV
Citroen 2CV
This post-WW2 designed car was a monument to minimalism, and very typically French. It’s practicality is to be begrudgingly respected but as a modern car it’s just ridiculous! The headlights stick out on little stalks, the roof is a bit of cloth that you can push back, the wheels are about 2 inches wide, the windows don’t open but instead fold in half… It’s just such a horrible little car. It was orginially designed as an “umbrella on wheels” to take French farmers to market and back. You know what? They should’ve kept it to themselves!

Smart

Smart car
Well, after many, many years as my most hated car, if the Citroen 2CV was ever to be toppled from its lofty perch, it would take something very special. So step forward… Mercedes? How can the designers of some of the automobile world’s finest vehicles be responsible for this… I can’t even find the words to describe it! This… affront to all that exists! But yes, sadly it’s true. Mercedes, in collaboration with Swatch (they of weird wristwatches) unveiled this in 1998 and the world has been a worse place since. If aliens made first contact with Humans, out of all the things in the world, out of all the things we’ve been responsible for, this pathetic thing is what I’d be most embarrassed by. Plus, if you crash in one at speed, you’re screwed!

 

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J.A. Laraque

J.A. Laraque is a freelance writer and novelist. His passion for writing mixed with a comedic style and intelligent commentary has brought him success in his various endeavors. Whatever the subject, J.A. has an opinion on it and will present it in writing with an insight and flair that is both refreshing and informative.