We review a very weird game called Panty Party and amazingly it is not what you might think it is.
When Randy first told J.A. about Genital Jousting, J.A. thought it was an invitation to a personal game. Little did he know the game was real.
God Hand: Press O to Spank
This video should go under the weird game files, but honestly God Hand itself was a pretty normal if not comical action game developed by Clover Studio and released by Capcom for the PlayStation 2. The game is a beat em up where you play a martial artist that uses the legendary God Hands that can save the world from Demons. In the game you can create long and unique combo attacks kind of like what was used in Killer Instinct. However, what makes this the video of the day is the spanking finishing move that you can only use against female enemies.
You got to love the Japanese.
[youtube id=”53fftSg_IHY” width=”633″ height=”356″]
I think a game where you tear the limbs of enemies and eat them, have an ability called “Tale a Doo” and can mate with multiple females by going to the “Love Tunnel” constitutes a weird game. Cubivore: Survival of the Fittest is an action adventure game created by Saru Brunei and released for the Nintendo GameCube in 2002.
In Cubivore your goal is to become strong enough to kill the top Cubivore known as the Killer Cubivore who is slowly killing nature due to gorging on the land. The only way to become strong enough to take on the Killer Cubivore and his cronies is to mutation and create offspring that will be able to defeat him.
Most of the gameplay revolves around traveling the world fighting other Cubivore’s and ripping off their libs. You also collect hearts throughout the game that will allow the female Cubivore’s you mate with to have children. The process of mutation and creating offspring actually has a strategy to it even if the combat itself is simple.
The game is definitely weird, but it is unique in its gameplay design. The graphics are extremely outdated and the music, while not bad can get old real fast. That really was the problem with the game overall, it became way to repetitive.
Long before Spore Cubivore introduced us to a weird new world of evolution and survival of the fittest.
Perhaps in the age of movies like Saw and Hostel a game like Thrill Kill would not seem weird to anyone, but back in 1998 the game was just a little too controversial for the publishers and so it was pulled from the U.S. market.
Thrill Kill was originally created for the Sony PlayStation and was to be a Mortal Kombat like game where you could perform trill kills in place of fatalities that featured blood, guts and disembowelment. In addition, there were moves with names such as “Bitch Slip” and “Swallow this” nothing stranger than what you might hear on a cable stations reality television show.
Besides the brutal nature of the gameplay there was also the matter of fetish costumes, BDSM and sexual references that in then end proved too much for the company set to release the game. The game was developed by Paradox Development and published by Virgin Interactive which is owned by Electronic Arts.
The story followes ten souls who died and went to hell and were then pitted against each other in a tournament by Marukka, the Goddess of Secrets. Whoever survived the tournament would be reincarnated effectively being rereleased back onto the citizens of earth (oh joy!). One of the innovated designed of the game was that up to four players could fight at the same time which at the time was not done before.
Now hype gave this game more press than anything else. First it was cancelled for being too controversial which in itself will make people want it. Then former employees that worked on the game released a version onto the internet. Because of the crazy thrill kills and mature content the game had sort of a cult following, but having played it, it was not really that good even for 1998.
Weird Games: Chiller
I have always liked shooting games. From the simple BB gun shooting games at carnivals to games like Operation Wolf and Time Crisis, there was something about shooting at things that made my young self smile. Then there was Chiller which took the arcade shooter and added horror and gore and scared little boy J.A. forever.
Chiller was first released to the arcades in 1986 from publisher Exidy and the game consisted of several different screens of horror settings like torture chambers and graveyards. Now you would think the goal would be to save the helpless victims trapped there and to shoot and the bad guys holding them there, but you would be wrong, horribly wrong.
Your mission is to figure out how to kill every victim on the screen the fastest way possible. Now you would think that all you would have to do is shoot the victims outright, but I guess being trapped in their living nightmare has given them super powers or something because if you try just shooting them it takes too much time to kill them and you lose.
The challenge is finding ways to activate the torture devices or other means to kill the victims. So an example of that would be shooting a lever on a stretching rack to pull the victim apart. There are also bonuses for shooting all targets on each screen which results in a bonus round, as if shooting off chunks of flesh and bone wasn’t enough.
Now this game was released in the U.S. for the NES and used the light gun to shoot. Obviously there were differences in the NES release including a storyline which said the victims were monsters not people (I guess that makes torture ok). Here is the storyline in a nutshell:
“Back in the middle ages a castle on the outskirts of town has been invaded by an evil force which is causing the dead to come back to life! You need to stop this force before it can create a large army and take over the town. …Each level also has 8 talismans hidden in it; you need to find and destroy these to stop the monsters from appearing.”
We have talked about Nintendo Censorship before so what was censored in this version of Chiller? Well, the infamous “shoot the clothes off the half buried woman” part was removed as well as things like shooting off the flesh of the victims and the body parts spread across many of the levels. Strangely enough one weird change was in the original was a monk hauling a wheel barrel of body parts across the screen. This was replaced with a nun pushing a baby carriage and yet you could shoot the nun.
Serious Nintendo WTF.
Sometimes you have a bad day and it appears Bears are no different. In this game from 505 Games, we meet a Naughty Bear that does not like being cute and cuddly like the rest of the bears and as a result is shunned and made fun of. Because of being ostracized by the community Naught Bear seeks revenge on his fellow Teddy Bears and you have thousands of different ways to scare, punish and disrupt bear society.
In Naughty Bear you have an entire island to explore and cause mayhem on. The island itself is divided into four parts with some sections and areas needing to be unlocked. There are a total of 28 levels on the island and tons of different objects to use and obstacles to overcome. Your job is not only to get revenge on the bears who tormented you, but also to avoid the law abiding bears who will try and stop your mischievous ways.
Now the game is not just about beating up bears. There is a “Mischief Points” system where the more you scared the bears and the different ways you scare them earns you more points. Not all bears will be frightened by the same thing so you have to mix it up. This combination along with the open world model keeps the game from getting stale as you come up with new ways to cause havoc.
You can find Naughty Bear for the Xbox 360 and the PlayStation 3. Long before the movie “Ted” this bear was naughty and the game is definitely weird.
When I pitched this series I had this game in mind. I thought the spanking game was weird, but this one takes the cake. Seriously, this was the kind of game that if it was released anytime near April you would think it was an April Fool’s joke, but no, it is a real game for a real (kind of) gaming system.
Super Pii Pii brothers was a $35 import for the Nintendo Wii (fitting name) and the gameplay was simple. Your mission was to put on a harness and “strap” the Wii remote to your crotch area and then pee into and onto a series of places and animals. I mean just look at the picture, if you saw your girlfriend walk in wearing that would you run or be happy? (Seriously, I’m asking here.)
In the game you start off with a series of toilets and as they open you need to aim yourself and tilt up to pee into the toilet. Also, you seem to have some serious bladder problems because the stream of pee is endless. So the key is to get most of the pee in the toilet and as little as possible on the floor. (This sounds like a game at any bar in America.)
Now when the toilets open sometimes a stray cat or other toilet critter may pop up and you actually get bonus points for peeing on them. (P.I.T.A. be damned). The game is said to have over 100 different bathrooms from all around the world. Check out what the Japanese had in mind for the main reason for playing this game from the translation on the box.
“Super Pii Pii Brothers promotes good bathroom skills and allows women to experience for the first time the pleasure of urinating while standing.”
So I guess this game is just for women who want to strap on a… you know what, let’s just end the article here on a high note.
Check out the game on Think Geek.
Ok, ok, the game isn’t real, but hey it still counts as a weird game.
Forget the big bang theory or intelligent design, the world was made by rolling a big ball of junk together and creating stars. Well, at least that is how the cosmos is recreated after it is destroyed. Katamari Damacy is a mix between a puzzle game and an action game as you play a prince who has to collect various fallen parts to recreate the cosmos your father, King of All Cosmos destroyed.
How did the moons and stars get destroyed? By binge drinking of course. After this event you have to roll around a magical ball called a Katamari that collection objects that will allow you to create a star once it becomes large enough. The game was released for the PlayStation 2 in 2004 and was created as a result of a school project affiliated with Namco.
Along with the main story there is a side story about a family whose father is an astronaut and as a result of the drunken destruction of the King is unable to go to the moon. Meanwhile his daughter can sense that the prince is trying to recreate the cosmos, but in the end they all get rolled up in the Katamari to make the moon. What a twist!
The gameplay is simple, but can get frustrating. The idea is to collect items smaller than the ball, but there are larger objects that can hit the ball knocking off your collected items and slowing your progress. The goal is to collect enough items to grow your ball large enough and turn it into a star. There are secrets to be found in the game as well as a two player mode that has you fighting to see who can collect enough objects first. The game also features a great soundtrack, so as weird as it might be it is worth checking out.
This has to be one of the most weirdest games in the series. Boong Ga Boong Ga, translated from Japanese to Spank ‘em is an arcade game where the overall goal is to “punish” various characters by spanking them.
[youtube id=”ejZVgu3QuHY” width=”633″ height=”356″]
The system itself features a large screen, a fist with two fingers pointing forward and a model of jean covered butt and legs bending over.
The game was created by Taff System a South Korean based company and the game states that playing it will make the gamer laugh and relieve the stress of everyday life. Now in the game you do not actually spank anything, at least not in the traditional way you might think. Instead, you preform Kancho, which is a child’s prank where you poke a distracted person in the butt while they are distracted, although in American I think that’s called 5 to 10 years in prison.
Here is an example of Kancho from the anime Naruto:
In the game you can select from eight characters players can punish including a “Ex-Girlfriend”, “Ex-boyfriend”, “gangster”, “Mother In Law”, “Gold-digger”, “Prostitute”, “child molester” and “Con-artist”. When you select the character, you can see their face on the screen and watch their expression change and you punish them.
It appears you can just hit the butt as well to score points and is that the Adams Family them during the character select?
If that was not weird enough the game also dispenses these cards that rate players on their sexual behavior. For players who receive a high score the machine will dispense a small plastic trophy in the shape of a pile of crap, a perfect ending to one of the weirdest games ever.
If you only saw the title, you would think this is some weird Japanese stalking game. Instead, what you have is a weird and creepy advertisement for Burger King that should have been a web game not an actual game for the Xbox 360.
Sneak King was one of three different games that Burger King offered back in 2006. I think you could purchase then for $2.99 with a value meal or something like that. In this game, the objective is to sneak up on people and deliver Burger King Burgers to them. Personally, I rather sneak up and deliver sausages but that is just me.
The gameplay works like this, you are in what they call a “sandbox”, which is a set area where you can walk around freely. You will see various people walking around and as they get hungry, a hunger icon will appear above their heads. Now I have no idea why you would need to sneak up on a hungry person to give them food, but that is exactly what you do.
Now like in games like Metal Gear Solid the idea is to stay out of their cone of vision. You can sneak up from behind, but the King makes a lot of noise so you have to be careful of that as well. You can also hide in places like garbage cans, (seriously, would you accept food from a guy popping out of a garbage can, what is this Final Fight?) or other such places.
So you can earn points for delivering fast or hiding versus sneaking. Also, the hunger meter starts blue and then turns red. If you wait too long to deliver the food the person passes out for a while. Now why are there hungry people walking around until they pass out, I dunno. Even stranger is if you time your food delivery just before they pass out you earn more points, way to care about humanity, Burger King.
This game has 80 challenges and once you finish them call you get a, Stealth Suit Overall, if you get this game for free or a few bucks maybe the weirdness is good enough to warranty the purchase, but don’t expect great graphics or long lasting gameplay.
Going through my thousands of M.A.M.E. games, I wanted to search for really weird games that people might not know about. There are definitely a lot of them, but today’s weird game come from the PC-Engine.
The game is called Toilet Kids and is about a kid who goes to the restroom in the middle of the night and gets sucked in. The kid wakes up in a world where everyone looks like toilet fixtures and he has to fight his way out. One of the best things is the boss of the game is called Urinal, seriously I could not make this stuff up.