Siege Breaker Sessions: The Death of Everquest Next

 

The Death of Everquest Next

The crew bids farewell to the game that we hoped would bring back the good old days of long spawn times, placeholder monsters and epic fights over dragons. Maybe not, but we were hoping the game would be good, but now we will never know. We also talk a little StarCitizen, April fool’s pranks, a technology update that we promise won’t put you to sleep and another Rizim rant in our latest podcast.

Nintendo 1DS Launching this Fall

With the huge success of the Wii U and the 2DS it was the perfect time to make this announcement.~J.A. Laraque

Nintendo 1DS Launching this Fall

For a while now people have been asking, “Why won’t Nintendo enter the mobile gaming market?” There have been a number of emulators and Nintendo-like games available for mobile systems, but a true Nintendo authorized mobile gaming unit eluded us, until now.

Nintendo 1DS

Coming November 12 is the Nintendo 1DS the portable system that will not only play all Nintendo titles from the NES to the GameCube, but will also play original DS titles. In addition, this handheld is a phone that can work on any mobile for carrier in Iran.

The Nintendo 1DS will have its own App store similar to the Apple or Android, (We did not mention Windows phones because seriously does anyone have a Windows phone, ok, that Nokia is cool. You remember Nokia right? Hey, what brand was the one that got infected with a virus and transformed in the Transformers move? Wait, didn’t that thing have missiles? Where did a phone get fuel to launch a missile?) that will allow you to download games. Classic NES game can go for as low as 99 cents, while newer titles can run as high as 9.99 or 99.99 or π.

The unit itself will start at –($99x^2) solve for x, and will feature a built-in NSA ready HD camera and video hidden cam recorder. Battery life is reported to be up to 12 hours when plugged in with a charger. Now, not only will you be able to play classic games, but many titles are being remade to support multiplayer and online play will tons of downloadable content, micro-transactions and no support for bugs ala Warner Bros Games.

So you might be asking yourself. Why now, why did Nintendo decide to do this. Well, part of it had to do with Flappy Bird. That scam, I mean, marketing program, proved very well for the developer. Also, we know Nintendo has had a long history of understanding the gaming market, especially in recent years including calling online gaming a fad and taking forever to switch to the compact disc format. With the huge success of the Wii U and the 2DS it was the perfect time to make this announcement.

Finally, and most importantly, it is April 1st and everyone knows the news you read on April 1 has to be real. It could not be say, a repost of a joke from last year when the website Nintendo1ds.com was created as a joke after the release of the 2DS. Especially, considering reputable sites like Obsolete Gamer have never done April fools posts before.

So head on our and get your 1DS today because like the people at Apple say, a fool and their money soon part.

Next Gen Xbox to play all PlayStation Games

xbox 720

Next Gen Xbox to play all PlayStation Games

In an announcement that will shake the console world Microsoft announced today that the next generation Xbox will play all current and future PlayStation games. “Let’s face it, we are an overpriced Blu-Ray player.” A Sony spokesman said. “Sure, we might feel like Xerox after seeing Windows, but when you are losing to a console named after a bodily function you have to make drastic changes.”

We asked an Xbox rep what game most fans are looking to play from the PlayStation library. “Well I was going to say Uncharted.” The spokesman said. “But then part three came out.” We asked how much will this added feature cost but we could not make out the answer from all the launching.

More not to come.

Happy April Fools.

Weird Games: Super Pii Pii Brothers

super_piipii_brothers

When I pitched this series I had this game in mind. I thought the spanking game was weird, but this one takes the cake. Seriously, this was the kind of game that if it was released anytime near April you would think it was an April Fool’s joke, but no, it is a real game for a real (kind of) gaming system.

Super Pii Pii brothers was a $35 import for the Nintendo Wii (fitting name) and the gameplay was simple. Your mission was to put on a harness and “strap” the Wii remote to your crotch area and then pee into and onto a series of places and animals. I mean just look at the picture, if you saw your girlfriend walk in wearing that would you run or be happy? (Seriously, I’m asking here.)

super_piipii_brothers-main

In the game you start off with a series of toilets and as they open you need to aim yourself and tilt up to pee into the toilet. Also, you seem to have some serious bladder problems because the stream of pee is endless. So the key is to get most of the pee in the toilet and as little as possible on the floor. (This sounds like a game at any bar in America.)

Now when the toilets open sometimes a stray cat or other toilet critter may pop up and you actually get bonus points for peeing on them. (P.I.T.A. be damned). The game is said to have over 100 different bathrooms from all around the world. Check out what the Japanese had in mind for the main reason for playing this game from the translation on the box.

super_piipii_brothers-control

“Super Pii Pii Brothers promotes good bathroom skills and allows women to experience for the first time the pleasure of urinating while standing.”

So I guess this game is just for women who want to strap on a… you know what, let’s just end the article here on a high note.

Check out the game on Think Geek.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yQNKRDFanQE[/youtube]

Ok, ok, the game isn’t real, but hey it still counts as a weird game.

Urine-controlled video games

Urine-controlled video games installed in London bar

Urine-controlled video games

Originally shared by GameCasa, after watching this I just had to share it with you all. I personally never understood a television in the bathroom. Even if you take a long shower do you really pay attention to the T.V.? On the other hand standing around playing the Wii (see what I did there?) could lead to some strange encounters.

Ever go to a bar and take a leak and a guy is standing there reading the USA today they put up there? Now imagine a guy playing video games for way to long with his junk out. I guess we in the U.S. do not need to worry about this for a while since this is in London.

[youtube width=”600″ height=”480″]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OlCe0VIL0Eg[/youtube]

Speaking of this Obsolete Gamer, Glen should have some insight on this.

Final Fantasy 7 Remix for 360 and PS3

Final Fantasy 7 intro
Final Fantasy 7 intro

After years of fans asking for a revamp of FF7 and the anger fans felt over getting only a small changed to the game in the PSP version Square Enix announced today the Final Fantasy 7 Remix.

Everyone remembers Cloud, Tifa, Aeris and of course Sepiroth well take a picture because it will last longer. None of these guys are going to be in the remix, in fact the remix we are talking about has nothing to do with the game and instead have to do with one of my favorite subjects, cos-playing.

So without further ado I am proud to present Obsolete Gamers first annual April Fool’s Day cos-play photo shoot staring character from the beloved FF7 RPG.

Cloud cosplay
Cloud cosplay
Vincent cosplay
Vincent cosplay
Sephiroth cosplay
Sephiroth cosplay
guy Tifa cosplay
guy Tifa cosplay

I would just like to thank all the fans of Obsolete Gamer for this chance to pull this April Fool’s prank on you. You guys rock! Thank you for the support!

Thanks to FANTAPANTS for the video!

Steve Ballmer Madness

[youtube id=”tGvHNNOLnCk” width=”633″ height=”356″]

Since it’s April Fool’s, figured I’d lighten up the mood by posting some of my favorite hits from my buddy Steve Ballmer.~Honorabili

Steve Ballmer Madness

“This is madness!”

Steve Baller, full rage
“Madness? This is Ballmer!”

“Can you believe it? REVERSI!” OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

Windows XP style

[youtube id=”8IufkbuD0″ width=”633″ height=”356″]

Love the testimonial at the end from the president of a major company.

Remember this song?

[youtube id=”PrwnJDQy0ic” width=”633″ height=”356″]

A VW commercial and Microsoft commercial rolled up into one!

But wait… there’s more!

[youtube id=”IY2j_GPIqRA&amp” width=”633″ height=”356″]

“No way!” Good to see poking fun at their older stuff! Good times!

And now for something a little different…

[youtube id=”wvsboPUjrGc” width=”633″ height=”356″]

I do feel like getting on my feet. Don’t you love this company? WTF. C’mon….

If that was too slow for you or you don’t like Miami Sound Machine, maybe the developers techno remix is a little better for you.

[youtube id=”KMU0tzLwhbE” width=”633″ height=”356″]

How about that for a ring-tone?

But if you’re feeling freaky…

[youtube id=”La_u1jPLOIA” width=”633″ height=”356″]

Just make sure you use the proper words during a formal interview. “That’s terribly sexy.”

***

Well, my brain is fried. Microsoft, don’t sue us but if you want to buy us out, call me! Keep checking our facebook for special news today!