Motivational Monday: Game Food

Rat Burger Parasite Eve demotivational poster
Rat Burger Parasite Eve demotivational poster
Rat Burger Parasite Eve demotivational poster

Motivational Monday: Game Food

No I’m not talking about the cheesy puffs, hot pockets and Mountain Dew you stuff down your gullets while pulling an all-nighter in World of Warcraft. This is about the food found within video games itself. Most of the time food was used in video games to replenish health, but as time went on food gave various power-ups and was even used as a hobby within a game. So let’s take a look at the use of food in video games shall we?

Gauntlet

Gauntlet food
Gauntlet food

Vile and covered in dust and death this dungeon be. The floor is littered with the fallen, of friend and foe. There may be no escape, but that does not weigh heavily on me because my resolve is strong. Even in the darkest night my blade shall shine, but even a great warrior such as I needs replenishment. There, next to the pile of bones bleeding ghosts. Can it be, a ham dinner cooked to perfection with knife and fork. Surely it is a gift from the God’s and not tainted by rot and poison. Next to it lays the remains of a fallen hero, another gift of treasure it must be. I will eat of this feast and take of this bounty and continue my quest because I know not yet of mad cow.

Final Fight

turkey final fight
turkey final fight

So one day my friend’s girl was kidnapped and it was up to me, Naruto color ninja, to save her. The streets were tough but I’m a Street Fighter. After hours of pounding on the Mad Gear gang I was pretty hungry. Thank goodness there was this garbage can sitting inside of the public restroom in the park. With a swift kick I found my price. A fully cooked, ready to eat turkey and it wasn’t even close to thanks giving. Thanks to this meal I was able to make my way to the gold coast and kick an old man in a wheelchair out of a window.

Castlevania: Rondo of Blood

Castlevania birthday cake
Castlevania birthday cake

Tis a cold night it was in the belly of the dark ones castle. Deep within was the chilling winds of evil and the stench of death surrounding my very being. Why or why did I wear my dress on this adventure? Thank goodness the count did not know of my paralyzing fear of the dark or he might not have setup all these lovely candles for me, vanilla scented if I smell correctly. As the night went on despair came over me. I thought of giving up and then I saw it, under the steps next to some dead rats. The Lord of Death did care, he remembered my birthday!

Super Mario Bros.

Super Mario Bros Mushroom
Super Mario Bros Mushroom

They told me I was addicted, but what did they know, they were second stringers at best. I had saved the princess time and time again and did she even once put out, no! So yeah, I sniffed the fire flower and ate some mushrooms, but it gave me power. I was in control; I could stop whenever I wanted too. Then it kept happening. The princess is in another castle, the guard would keep telling me. I’d been there before. I knew I should have just gone directly to castle 8. Finally I slayed the dragon and went to claim my prize once again, but all I heard was laugher. I blackout and awoke days later. Bowser was laughing at me. He showed me the heads of all the mushroom guards. I had killed them while under the influence of poison mushroom. I had failed her. My lust of power-ups lead me down a dark path, one from which I would never escape.