Obsolete Gamer

video game

3D Blood Gaming
Humor
Umar Khan

I Want This Motherf#$^in’ 3D Out of My Motherf%$@in’ Games!

When I saw Avatar was being marketed as a 3D movie I was fine with that because it said from the get-go that it was slating to be a 3D movie. It was specifically made to enhance this experience and there wasn’t enough 3D in movies around that time. Then this “Fern Gully” rip off got huge and popular and now every movie that was made for 2D is quickly adding a 3D experience. I admit though, I am a bit of a hypocrite and have seen plenty of movies in 3D since then. Alice in Wonderland had to have been the worst use of the technology thus far next to Toy Story 3 (was there even anything popping out in this movie?).

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Editorials
J.A. Laraque

I proposed by hacking Chrono Trigger

…some might feel doing something like this is stupid or nerdy, well its nerdy, but not stupid at all. We have all kinds of strange proposals, strange to us, but not to the people involved. With shows like Bride Wars and Bridezilla I think finding two people who love video games get together in a video game is fitting. Besides, dude she plays Chrono trigger, she’s a keeper!

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Bump N Jump cover
Arcade Games
J.A. Laraque

Bump N Jump

Jumping does not just crush cars and trucks it is also to jump over the numerous broken bridges in the game. (I told you the stimulus package was necessary) It is also a good way to get out of a sticky situation. For instance when you bump into a enemy car it will give a little push back and if you are coming up fast on one of the out-sticking jagged edges on the road you can use your jump to safely navigate back to the middle of the road where you mainly want to be.

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Master of Orion box cover
Computer Games
Honorabili

Master of Orion

The game consists of you taking turns (non-simultaneous) with your rivals, managing your planets’ development, research directions (allows multiple research projects at a time vs 1 in later space empire games, which I think that’s unrealistic), your spy projects (they can sabotage, steal tech, be sleepers), your diplomacy (make alliances, actually never do almost, and trade tech, start trade deals, threaten and demand tribute, end and start wars), and conquer conquer conquer. You can orbitally bombard planets to dust basically or be smart about your killing (because later the weapons can literally scorch all populations out of existence, even one ship) and enslave, I mean welcome the conquered population to your empire.

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Dawn of War 2 Space Marines
Modern PC Gaming
Honorabili

Warhammer 40K: Dawn of War 2

There are different game modes: single player and co-op storyline campaign, skirmish which you can set to PVE or play with a combination of other players together or against each other in the tradition of online pvp play that’s now commonplace, and the recently added mode of The Last Stand. The campaign consists of you or your gaming partner following a series of linear and also randomly generated conquer and defend missions with your squad of hero units which have leveling through combat/objectives (also a level cap) and the acquisition of relics (wargear) that modify the combat characteristics/tactics of each squad. You can only play as the human Space Marine faction in the campaign.

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